Just How It Is

You knew she never loved you. Or loved you as much as you did. All those signs she showed and yet you followed her through the darkness. All she wanted to do was lead you in and leave you there. You thought she was with you the whole time, holding your hands through the darkness, helping you fight your demons, but she wasn’t. You thought she was. You told yourself she was the one. That she is the one that is going to end the misery that you’ve been going through for all these years. Little did you know that she’s the one who’s gonna make it even worse. You were blinded. You were blinded by false hope. You believed that after all these years of pain and agony, something good can happen. It did but not for long. You lied to yourself. You pushed her inside you deeper and deeper with every time you looked at her. What you didn’t realize was, the more you pushed her inside of yourself, the harder it is going to be to take her out. Because the seeds of her existence have already been planted in your heart and with every smile, it grew deeper and deeper like a parasite thriving for your heart. You loved the feeling. She was your drug. You were an addict. You consumed more of her everyday. She made you happy only for the present. The repercussions were going to be disastrous. You believed in her. You confided in her. You trusted her. You got too lost in your own happy world that you failed to see her true self. She finally let go of you. She never held you hand in the first place. It was all an illusion. A realm of your mind where anything is possible. She left you all alone in the darkness for you to find your way out of it. But you can’t because you have to find yourself first. The roots of her seeds grown in too deep to be pulled out and you don’t want it to be pulled out.


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