I stood there looking at them. Looking at them laughing with the people they care and cherish. Their happiness gave me strength that one day I too would be happy. With a fake smile on my face I watched them but little did they know about the thoughts racing in my head. The sun goes up and down and the moon takes its place and things never seem to change. I try to be happy and for some reason but my hormones fail to bring about a change in me. I stand alone looking up to the Angels hoping that they would look at me. I too used to be happy like them. But that’s the past. When life constantly screws you and only you and when there is a cloud above my head and the sun fails to show up and the feeling of being alienated by everyone adds to this. My parents Love me. I know that they did. But when I spend most of my time in hatred and in pain, their love does not heal my wounds. My parents have always been there for me and the choice that I’m about to take is gonna destroy their world. To me that was the best card in play and I failed to see the repercussions. I thought about it day and night. All those countless hours of sleep trying to figure out if it was worth it. I stood on the roof of my school building, breathing the cold harsh air as it blew on my face. I watched the birds fly away like they knew what was about to happen next. I took a step forward, my legs did not shiver because I knew what was gonna happen and I told myself everything will be okay. I looked up to the Angels and smiled and took a step forward with my eyes closed and I plummeted to the ground and everything went blank. The next day they announced the cause of my death, suicide. But they did not tell the reason. I thought people wouldn’t cry if something like this happened to me. But they cried. People who I thought didn’t cry about me, cried for me. My parents were destroyed as I expected. They were crying because everything they loved is no more. But I’m watching them but now I can’t do anything about it.
Well the point of all of this is because suicide is stupid. I get it, people out there go through a lot of difficult times in their lives and it is hard to take it in. Life is a bitch but suicide is not the answer to all your problems. You just got to help yourself and not wait for someone to do it for you. I wrote this not to emphasise on the concept of suicide but how pointless it is. I just want people to understand this. Everything will be okay.
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